Monday, January 23, 2012

And This Too Shall Pass - And I Will Help It Pass

Well, it's a Monday.

   The day started off not too bad, we slept in, a family fave! :-)   Had some breakfast, then it started.  The ignoring, attitude, tears, whining, stomping, "No one loves me", "You're the worst Mom" and so on.  Why?
   My youngest , 7, was on the computer for four + hours playing a computer game.  Yes, it was on an 'educational' site, however.  He sat through lunch and snack time, since he didn't want to get off and 'give it up to his brother'.  I felt I had to almost pry him off.  Finally, after his brother complaining and trying to help, he became too upset and frustrated and left in a rage.
    I know many unschoolers allow this for their children, but after today and much pondering, I'm not.  There is TOO much research out there about kids being desensitized from too much time on the computer.  With my kid it's true, too.  He doesn't know the meaning of stop, no, or quit and becomes violent towards others in and out of the house.  He becomes TOTALLY unreasonable and irrational.  There is NO talking to him some days.  (Yes, people, he does get consequences, punishments, and reasoned with and still acts like he's two.  He's not getting his way, period.)  He has shown he succeeds better with rules and boundaries, even if he doesn't like them.
   Some say 'It may be 'just a phase' and 'he needs to get it out of his system', but this will be one enjoyment he'll have to earn.  I've had it!
   He has had these tendencies before and has calmed down a lot when we started homeschooling. MANY people have noticed a change in his behavior.  I have noticed that this happens now when ever he doesn't get his way or is on the MAC too long.  Normally, 30 minutes is the limit and many time he's gone over, Just like today.  Now he needs to earn it.
   His unschooling will come from his own computer, not internet lined, that he can play as many games as he likes.  He can play Lego's, go outside, do just about anything else because he is interacting with others, being a active member of this household, and more of a human.

   As for my other son, 9.  What did he do?  Complained that brother was on the computer for so long.  Sat beside him and watched and tried to help him.
   Yet, I could distract him with -  the rest of our Cribbage game.  Complain.  Mad Libs.  Complain, Three games of shut the box.  Complain.  I read a book about new ways to multiply (got through x6).  Complain.  Complain.  Complain.
    Me getting frustrated = Big fight = him on and happy.


Tomorrow is a new day.  Thank goodness!

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